Bricks

The rubble that was our house is being cleared away. They are busting things up and making the land new. The slate will be clean. Rebuilding will be made possible. 

It was a structure. A place to dwell. The fire burned hot and destroyed everything to ashes. But the bricks remained. The bricks were charred and black but they survived. I wanted those bricks. They were something that I hated when they stood in tact. I complained about the color. I did not like them. I just wanted to paint over them or get a new surface. 

But it is funny how important the surface becomes when you are going to lose it. Those bricks housed my family. Those bricks protected us. They held our cries, our joys, our screams, our laughter, our love. 

I wanted to save some of those bricks to bring into our new home. Our new dwelling place. The thought is to clean them up a little. Leave some of the character and make them even more beautiful. 

When the men came early to clear the mess, I was not prepared. I had not collected my bricks. I cried and panicked. I drove to the house. I called my friend crying. It was a bit of an overreaction. But this meant something to me. I tried to communicate to a Spanish speaking man that I needed those bricks. He looked at me like I was a little CRAZY! I just started hauling bricks to our backyard. My greatest friend came and together we piled those bricks that are going to be made into something beautiful.  

When I asked Jesus to speak His name Boldly, the Spirit came in and started tearing down bricks. My thoughts, feelings, emotions, behaviors and attitudes. They are ugly, charred and gross, but they are still my bricks. Sometimes I want to hold on to those bricks. They were mine for 33 years. They were my feelings, my love, my life. But Jesus claims those bricks now. I give Him ALL my bricks. I ask Him to make them beautiful. That others would see Him when they see my bricks. 

All the character that I have is being refined. All the best parts of me are being used so others can see the ONLY ONE who is worth seeing. Jesus. 

I don't care what my life is or does as long as when people see me, they see HIM. When God asks  something, that I say Yes. Obedient. Loving people as I have been loved by God. Showing Mercy as I have been shown Mercy. Leading others to a life of freedom and of service to the least. 

Therefore, remember that formerly you who are Gentiles by birth and called "uncircumcised" by those who call themselves "the circumcision" (which is done in the body by human hands)- remember that at that time you were separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ. Ephesians 2:11-13

I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. Ephesians 1:18-19

Redeemed

I am redeemed, you set me free

So I'll shake off these heavy chains and 

Wipe away every stain

Cause I'm not who I used to be

I am redeemed.....I'm redeemed.  

Redeemed. "To buy out," especially for purchasing a slave with a view to his freedom. 

I was a slave. Anger was my master. I walked where it wanted me to walk. I talked like it wanted me to talk. I hated like it asked me to hate. 

I was a slave. Covetousness was my master. I desired and lusted after objects. Consumed by envy over what I was without. Hating those who had more than me. Defeated.

I was a slave. Insecurity was my master. I would not let people see me. I did not want to embrace women as friends. I put on my fake smile all the while slowly dying away on the inside. 

At some point you think, "maybe this is the best it ever gets." This could be normal. The master beats you down so low that even when you can escape, you won't. 

They say call on Him and He will save you. But maybe just maybe the darkness doesn't want to be saved. It's comfortable in the dark. No one really questions you in the dark. You can tell them everything is fine and they believe. 

Part of you screams from your soul. Just rescue me! Just see me. Even though you have no idea what it is you need rescuing from. 

This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. John 3: 19-21

The deeds are just deeds. The living is your whole self in the everyday walk through this world. 

Fear is a lie. God did not give us a spirit of fear. Bring it to the light. Just one thing at a time. The more you expose it to Christ the more His blood pours out covering you. He broke and bled so we could be free. 

God sent a savior. Not to condemn the world but to save the world through him. John 3:17

You are not judged you are saved. It's already been done. I can tell you He Loves. 

If our Father does not judge, then who are we to judge? We are called out of bondage. The chains that bind you should only be bound to Jesus.

I am not longer a slave to the enemy. I am an ambassador for Jesus. 

For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that in this I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak. Ephesians 6:2

IF

If Gathering happened over the weekend. One woman started with a vision 7 years ago. Jennie Allen. This gathering was held in Austin. 1200 women of all denominations gathered in one building. If Local was women coming together all over the world in homes, churches and theaters to stream the sessions live. 21,000 women. No cost to go. No paid speakers. Only relying on God because He called them to do it and they said Yes.

Theology was different but one theme was strong. JESUS. Lovers of JESUS. The premise was If God is Real...Then what? What do we do about that? How do we live this radical life out? In our gathering of Crosspoint women, hearts were changed. Light overcame Darkness. Freedom was found. Repentance was sought. And Jesus came. Repentance comes before Revival. (Ann Voskamp) We were a body of broken hearts and souls. Wondering what else is there in this life of Pearland. We once were dead in transgressions and sins but because of His GREAT LOVE, His MERCY and His GRACE we are Free. Now take that into our city of Pearland.

 What if we take LOVE, MERCY and GRACE into the lives of those that have not been set free? Not rules and regulations, but JESUS CHRIST. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.

 Ephesians 1:22-23 His fullness fills everything. HIS FULLNESS FILLS EVERYTHING! Not Kristen, Not Angie, Not Katie, Not Laurie, Not Ashley, Not Amber, Not Alyssa, Not Katie E, Not Allyson, Not Crystal. JESUS CHRIST the Chief Cornerstone IN Kristen, Angie, Katie, Laurie, Ashley, Amber, Alyssa, Katie E, Allyson and Crystal. So we as a BODY of BELIEVERS, From the same womb of Jesus. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God LIVES BY HIS SPIRIT. Ephesians 2:21-22

 This is a Revival. We no longer can sit back and hold this in. There is a building of the Holy Temple happening in Pearland Texas. We go out and we show Jesus to those that need him most. We invite others to our party. I was late, so late arriving, but I made it to the party. I want every soul in this city at the Jesus party. God want souls to have the fullness of him who fills everything in every way. No more searching. No more bitterness. No more anger. No more hate. Just Love. Just God.

 How simple and yet how so complex. What can we do now? How will He use you when you choose Yes? He does not call the equipped, but equips the called. I have been called. I have said yes. These other women have said yes. We strive to show His love in our everyday. To each person we come in contact with. What a great redemption for our city if we earnestly choose to walk with Him.

 P.S. Please Pray for my friend Amy McPeaks daughter Meagan. She is very sick in CCU fighting for life.

Fight

Some days are hard. It's hard to get up. What is the purpose of starting again with the day. God is so big and so powerful and we are so small and so insignificant. How is it that one person, on one day, can impact this place? How will I impact this time and this place?

Then I remember who my enemy really is.

12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities,against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 6:12

We are at war. We struggle everyday to get up and fight. We put on the full armor of God and prepare for battle. The greater the obedience, the harder the fight. And this is our defense. 

1. Scripture
2. Immediate obedience

I find that when I know God is calling me to be obedient and I don't it makes me feel separated. We all lived among it at one time. "Gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts." Ephesians 2:3. 

But we are created for a different purpose. We are created for God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

Do you see what that says? You are created for a work that was planned before you even thought of it. EVERY SINGLE ONE. 

Yes you have a work to complete. What are you fighting for? Get up. Pull on your big girl panties and fight for your cause! 

Remember when you were separated from Christ? Excluded from citizenship? Without Hope? Without God in your world? 

But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ. 

We miss so many because we assume so much. This is a war for our salvation. Living in this world with beauty and love instead of ugliness and hate. We hold ourselves to a different standard. To not bring it up. Not talk unless it's things of motherhood and makeup. What if our conversations changed to Christ? What if our talk was that of healing and hope for those who have none. This is real. There are people who are lost even when they look like it's all together. 

I WAS ONE OF THEM. God has asked. Obey. What will it do? I will tell you. It will lead you to a life of purpose. This life that God says he planned for you. Our time here is short and our purpose has eternal consequences. The luxury of waiting on someone else to step up has come and gone. 

It is terrifying to me. It is hard to speak of Jesus in the midst of a selfish world. I couldn't even mutter His name much less proclaim that He is my savior. But once the light shines in your darkness, you want it to shine for the rest. Fear is not an option anymore. At least not for me. I can't stand up without the help of my savior. But He promises He will never leave me. 

If we as a generation of women do not stand up for our sisters and friends then who else will? 

Rooted

There's a stirring deep within me. Could it be my time has come?

When I'll see my gracious savior.

Face to Face when all is done.

Is that his voice I am hearing?

" Come away my precious one."

Is he calling me? Is he calling me?

I will rise up! I will rise up!

And I'll bow down

And lay my crown

At his wounded feet.

These lyrics are playing over and over in my mind. There is a stirring. And He is calling me. I have laid down my crown. My life that was so consumed by me. So comfortable in my misery. Anger. Bitterness. Hate. I hid it well. Oh so well.

But I could no longer hide from Him. He was calling me. Day after day. Whispering my name in the quite places of my soul. But my flesh wanted what my flesh wanted.

The change that can happen when you lay down your crown. You are no longer the ruler. You are not longer the queen. You are a servant of this gospel by the gift of God's grace given to you through the working of his POWER! Ephesians 3:1

I can testify that it is the best life you can have. Become a Prisoner for the Lord. Replace that emotion, whatever it may be for you, for being completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:1-2

What if you could trade off all the anger and hurt for joy. Friends I am telling you that you can. The only way to life is through Christ.

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being; so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you , being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the Lord's holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge-that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:16-19

The concept is real. What if we started to come together as a community of believers to grasp this concept of Christ love. What if we were Christ in the center of Pearland. Instead of fixing our eyes on what we can do for ourselves, what if Christ works through us to touch the broken. You are encountering brokenness in every person. We all have something that needs the love of the Lord's holy people. God says it plain as day. There is power in the community of holy.

Holy is set apart. Different from the rest. When you say Yes to God, you say Yes to Holy. I strive for holiness. I strive for different. I strive to lay down my crown every day.

I want to be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. We have been called out. Separated.

There is a stirring. It's all around me. God has big plans up ahead. Plans to prosper you and to not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Hope

God has given me a vision. A very clear and very detailed vision. I said YES to Boldness. I said YES to obedience. The vision has come but the HOW, the WHO and the WHEN  have not yet come.

God has covered my eyes and my heart with a blindfold until the big reveal. I know this is going to be huge. I know that when it starts it's going to be full steam ahead. I feel this, deep down in my bones. I'm taking a leap here. I'm also terrified of failure. I'm so scared that I will disappoint and screw up. Sometimes I second guess God.

But I cannot afford to second guess God. I cannot afford to go back to the dark. I covet the light. He is my light in the darkness that was my soul. I will not let my enemy win this battle. Satan is fighting dirty. God says go ahead, Christ now claims her soul.

I had a spiritual encounter at work on Saturday. I've been praying constantly about this vision. It's messing me up. I had the book Nehemiah come to my mind Saturday night. It's like a blue print for mission. I had never even looked in this book before. The next night my co-worker told me that she was compelled to tell me to read Nehemiah. WOW. We ended up "having church" for like the next 5 hours.

God puts this mission on Nehemiah's heart. The Bible says that he was very disturbed to hear the news about the destruction of the wall and the state of  Jerusalem. So disturbed that  he wept.  He wants to rebuild the wall. To make it grand again. To make it safe again. To bring the people home. He just doesn't know the HOW, the WHO and the WHEN.

God uses a pagan king to give Nehemiah the resources to re- build the wall. There were over 40 sections that were built by different people. This was not just one man. This was a community. God gives one person the vision and the resources but it takes an entire community to get it done.

This was a miracle after reading how many people built different parts. It was complete in 52 days. 1.6 miles of wall. "and not a gap was left in it." When God leads you in your plans, there is no weakness in the product.

The opposition to this wall was great. The enemy schemed, lied, confused, deceived and intimidated. But they did not give in. "the people worked with all their heart." They were afraid many times. Sometimes the intimidation was more than they wanted to handle.

Here was the rally cry from Nehemiah, "Don't be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes."

When the wall was finished this is what happened. "When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self confidence, because they realized that this work had been done with the help of our God."

I can not live life in fear of failure. When God calls us to a mission and we accept with all our heart, He will see it through. Although I don't know how this is going to work or who is coming on this journey with me, I know that my King has my back. My enemy will not win this battle. I say YES to the stripping down of my desires and the filling up of Jesus.

I have 1.5 Acres of land that will someday house more than the McGinns. God has given us a vision and all 4 of us choose to say YES.

Jeremiah 29:11-14
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you, declares the Lord, and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."

Thankful

If you are anything like me, then sometimes you get depressed about what you don't have. You have "that person" or maybe even "those people." You know. The person that has everything you want or does everything right. Constantly comparing yourself is exhausting. I know because I did that. Like ALL THE TIME. Instead of peace I was in turmoil. It's so hard to not get caught up in the game. We set the standard to live by our neighbor and not by our savior.

 I loved to relish in my despair of "it's not good enough." I drove myself crazy and resented the people that I loved. I did not even know that my heart could feel a different way. But now I know true contentment. When you have nothing left you rejoice even for the junk! My heart has had a makeover. No matter that the furniture doesn't match. No matter that every wall is white. No matter that that the backsplash is pink and green. No matter that the dishwasher and stove are 1980.

 When you have nothing you are grateful for everything. What if this concept was kept when we find ourselves in self pity? Grateful for everything. Thankful for everything. Instead of focusing on what we don't have, focusing on what we do have. The minute I knew I could have lost my girls was the minute I understood what is real. They are real. They are worth getting worked up about. My lack of things is not.

  Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined-then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. Hebrews12:7-10

I know that the lessons learned from this hardship are part of my journey to holiness. I pray daily that I will continue to be shaped and molded into the follower of Christ that I meant to be. May I be disciplined and may I submit to my Fathers way that I can continue to truly LIVE. I am loved. I am Thankful. I am His.

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